Staying Positive While Fighting Flying Monkeys (Interview with Steven Vannoy & Book Giveaway)

     Staying positive is a big challenge for writers.   Edit 20 times, feel nauseous licking the envelope, and then wait 4 months for a submission response.  A yes means a two year journey of editing, marketing, illustrating, and printing before your book is in your hands.  And then there are all the no's.

   

     How do you stay positive in the face of so much negativity?  Enter the Energy Map*.  Picture a circle.  The circle is 100% of your time, energy, and potential.   Some amount of your time and energy is spent on the front of the circle (the positive side), and some amount is spent on the back (the negative side).

     The front side of the circle is a beach.  The sun shines brightly on your hammock swinging between two palm trees.  Entertainment is provided by a lizard tasting the sea air with a flick of his tongue. The ocean is calm enough to wade up to your belly button, with just enough waves to keep you jumping.  Life is good - your accomplishments are many, your productivity is high, your energy is strong.   You are learning and growing.   

     The back side of the circle is dark and drizzly with a sky full of flying monkeys trying to steal your hammock and capture your lizard.  Nothing is going right - you are brooding about the last rejection letter, worrying this novel will never be finished, and blaming the laundry for thwarting your editing attempts.    You are floundering in a sea of problems.

     Crummy things happen to good people like you and me.   We can't control the flying monkeys, but we can control our response by focusing on the front side of the Energy Map.   To quote my favorite philosopher Jimmy Buffett: "You only have two choices, having fun or freaking out, that's what it's all about."

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     I had the opportunity to interview Steven Vannoy- all around positive guy and co-author of Stomp the Elephant in the Office which introduces the Energy Map.  Read the interview and his tips for questions to help you spend more time on the positive side (in blue).

Lauri:  Steven, first to clarify your superhero status, how much of your time is spent on the front side versus the back side?     

Steven:  95% in the neutral/fact zone or on the front side. Over the years I have found that the front side is not always positive.  Eventually I might feel positive as a result of focusing on the front side, yet sometimes I might be feeling quite crummy in a challenging situation whether I’m focusing on the back side or front side.  Yet, when I have the discipline to focus more on the front side I create a momentum that gets me closer to where I need to go; and then it can feel positive.   P.S.  I am surely not a super hero, but I dearly want to be a good man and a good example for my family, friends, teammates, customers and even strangers.   When I live this way, I am emotionally healthy, happy, clear headed and add a lot more value to every conversation and interaction. 

Lauri:  So you are human. How do you identify when you are on the back side of the Energy Map?

Steven:   My Awareness Muscle kicks in and tells me that I’m wasting my time and life.  Over the years, I have become very aware of my thoughts, and I quickly see if they are going in an unproductive direction.

Lauri:  After you flex your Awareness Muscle, how do you find the bridge to the positive side?

Steven: Lauri, this is your best question of all.  As my Awareness Muscle kicks in, I quickly position the facts of the situation in the middle of the map/circle.   This tells me that the event is not good or bad, but that it just is. Then I start asking questions that move me forward in a healthy way.  So let’s say that my manuscript has just been rejected, the questions may be: What can I learn from this?   What can I reap and use from the last time something like this happened?  How can I use this situation to grow stronger?  What are all the things I have done well to get this far already?  How would I like this to turn out, what is my dream?    Why is that so important to me?  What are most important action steps to go forward in a healthy way?  As you already know, with these questions, there’s no room for thoughts on the back side, and every bit of my energy is moving forward.   Instead of digging a big depressing hole for myself, I bolster my knowledge, confidence and roll on. 

Lauri:  I like it on the positive side.  Please don't make me leave!  How do I stay on the positive side?    

Steven: All of the strategies we’ve talked about so far: Awareness Muscle, choices, smart questions, and here are a few more.  As your Awareness Muscle becomes even stronger, notice when you’re on the front side and have lots of quiet little internal celebrations.   You’ll then move even stronger toward that orientation.  Also, make wise choices on what you put in your head, from what books you read to TV programs you watch, to what friends you hang around with, and especially, what you decide to chat about when you’re with that friend. Finally, always remember that you are not your thoughts and that your brain works for you vs. you working for your brain.   Therefore, you and I get to decide what we put into our brains and where we put our focus, and I’m so worth one very healthy focus! Over time, that focus and the resulting choices I make determine my life.  Thank you, Lauri!!!!   sv

Lauri: Steven, thank you so much for the interview and for offering a copy of your book to one of my readers.  

Steven:  Ooh, did that say book giveaway?   Yes!  Please share in the comments how you will use these tips in your life.  One lucky winner will receive a free copy of Stomp the Elephant in the Office.


Lauri:  You heard the man! Get down there and leave a comment for a chance to make a positive change in your life.

*Energy Map © Verus Global Inc. All Rights Reserved. Used with permission.  http://www.verusglobal.com/About-Us/