Jimmy Cantore Steals Christmas
Ho, ho, ho!
It's time for another fun year of Susanna Hill's Christmas Story Contest. She's come up with a doozy this year.
It's time for another fun year of Susanna Hill's Christmas Story Contest. She's come up with a doozy this year.
The Contest: Write a children's story (children here defined as approximately age 12 and under) in which wild weather impacts the holidays! Your story may be poetry or prose, silly or serious or sweet, religious or not, based on Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or whatever you celebrate, but is not to exceed 350 words. Stories must be posted by Friday December 12 at 11:59 PM EST.
Here is my entry in 348 words. The original idea was ReindeerNado...but then the toys got mixed in, and here's where we ended up. (Note: This story is fictional and any resemblance to persons living or not is purely coincidental!) :D
Jimmy Cantore Steals Christmas
By Lauri Meyers
Jimmy Cantore tightened the last nut on the Weatherstation
2000 Wind Turbine. His plan was simple. The machine would create enough wind to
sweep over the block. All the presents Santa delivered would be blown right to
Jimmy’s porch!
He flipped the switch.
Whirr, whirr.
Fwhoosh!
A remote-controlled racecar! Winner!
Shwoosh!
A telescope – out of this world!
Whoosh!
An X Box! Game on!
Whish, swish, plop!
A dragon! A train! A pee-pee doll?
The toys came faster and faster from every direction and
buried Jimmy. He climbed over a rocking horse and pushed out a bouncy ball.
Fwooth!
“Oh-sugar-cookies!” a voice called.
Thunk.
A fluffy white beard flew right into him.
"Why, hello, Jimmy. I hope you enjoyed the
Understanding Weather Kit I brought last year."
"Um, yes. I've learned a lot," said Jimmy.
"Perhaps too much."
Jimmy's cheeks turned red.
Santa shimmied through the hole and pulled Jimmy out.
“I must be on my way. It’s a busy night for me.”
"But all these presents have to go back," Jimmy cried.
Santa hiked up his red trousers.
"I didn’t mean for so many presents to fly here,” Jimmy said. Santa stroked his beard.
“Maybe if I flip the wind direction the gifts will fly away.
But how will they get back to the right places?"
 |
| (Old Santa Claus by Alcide Nikopol via freeimages) |
“I’ll take care of that,” Santa said.
Jimmy flipped the switch. A tornado of presents lifted into
the air. Santa laid a finger aside of his nose, and the gifts flew down
chimneys and magically snuck through keyholes.
“I’m sorry, Santa,” Jimmy said, but no one was there. “Ho,
ho, ho!” echoed through the sky.
Jimmy was surprised to see a present from Santa Christmas
morning. He opened it slowly knowing it would be coal. His eyes lit up when he
read the box – Deluxe Snow Making Kit.
“Wow, if I hook this up to the wind turbine, I could create a
blizzard!” Just then a jingling bell reminded him to read the card.
Jimmy, I trust you’ll
figure out how to use this, but please use only as directed. - Santa
Hmm, let's see if Jimmy remembers the admonition by next year. :D
ReplyDeleteWell, I mean he couldn't make that big of a blizzard...could he?!
DeleteJimmy's quite an inventor! Cute story. :)
ReplyDeleteWell the weatherstation 2000 is a pretty sophisticated piece of machinery:)
DeleteLove it! This one suits my son to a "T." Cheers!
ReplyDeleteThank you! Sounds like you have a fun, inventive, weather-loving son.
DeleteWhat a fun story, Lauri. Every kid's dream. Very nice use of onomatopoeia!
ReplyDeleteIt always sounds like a good idea, until you're buried in a pile of presents!
DeleteLove the onomatopoeia. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThank you - I had to make up a few, because I was unsure what sound a Santa barreling through the air would make.
DeleteGreat story, Lauri! I love that Jimmy is an inventor!
ReplyDeleteI always wanted to be an inventor, so I've got to write an inventor book at some point:)
DeleteSo creative, Lauri! Little Jimmy has quite the personality!
ReplyDeleteHe means well, Penny, really he does:)
DeleteLauri, what a creative "twist" on the weather factor! Good luck! :)a
ReplyDeleteThis is way funny -- definitely something a kid would try (if they had a weather machine).
ReplyDeleteThe classic simple plan gone way wrong.
DeleteVery original Lauri. I enjoyed your story a lot. Pacing nice.
ReplyDeleteThat 350 word always forces pacing, right?
DeleteWhat a clever story! I love it. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you - weather was a fun inspiration.
DeleteSuper fun, Lauri! Pee pee dolls made me chuckle and tornado of presents was epic! But, I loved that Jimmy's genius was met by the white beard himself. A little lesson never hurts anyone, huh? :)
ReplyDeleteWe learn lessons every day whether we like or not! I wanted to get across that his plan was just to get the boys presents...I don't know how he thought that was going to work!
DeleteHa ha. I really enjoyed this story. I'll have to remember "sugar cookies."
ReplyDeleteIt helps to be working on Christmas cookies while editing:)
DeleteHow clever and original, Lauri! I love that he got more than he bargained for and changed his tune and wanted to return everything. Great word phrasing and sound words...what a fun story. ;)
ReplyDeleteIt's like that whole "I wish Christmas was every day!" desire...too much of anything is no good!
DeleteHahaha! That Jimmy is a clever one, Lauri :) He reminds me a little of Simon Barsinister - but not as evil :) Love that he took his present and put it to creative and inventive good use (even if it was a little misguided at first) and can imagine what kind of trouble he'll get into with the Deluxe Snow Making Kit, warnings or not :) But I think he learned his lesson... at least temporarily :) Thanks so much for joining in the holiday fun!
ReplyDeleteThanks Susanna! I feel that way with my children - it seems like they've learned a lesson, but then 5 minutes later they are at it again!
DeleteThere's quite a bit of wiggle room on Santa's Nice List, I see. If stealing presents doesn't make you "naughty" what on earth does? ;)
ReplyDeleteI loved this story, Lauri -- every magical, whimsical line of it. And, if anyone needs evidence that it is a Lauri Story, there's the designated pee pee joke! Well done!
There was one point during edits where I thought, "this is starting to sound like an Allegra story." That's when I realized it needed a pee-pee joke and near-swearing. :)
DeleteCute, Laurie! Every kid would love to receive a gift like that. The doll was a funny touch! Good luck :)
ReplyDeleteI love science experiment gifts. I even got my hubby a weather station this year (um, aged 8 and up).
DeleteJimmy is going to be a great weather man when he grows up! Fun story! Thanks for stopping by my blog to read mine. :)
ReplyDeleteYes he is! That toy tornado experience will take him far.
DeleteThat's a very understanding Santa. Next blizzard we get, I know who to blame!
ReplyDeleteSanta is at the core an understanding man. Why if he were walking around huffing about how tight some chimneys are or why someone left him snickerdoodles even though he doesn't like them, he wouldn't be very jolly!
Delete